Sucker Punch

Zack Snyder, director of '300,' 'Dawn of the Dead,' 'Watchman' and now 'Sucker Punch' went to school in Pasadena, California and studied filmmaking. One of his classmates was Michael Bay. Bay and Snyder both went on to successful careers in advertising (as commercial directors) before making the move to the cinema.

I say this because as I watch this trailer, I feel like I am being told to buy the sizzle. Not the steak.

'Sucker Punch' is not based on any pre-existing material, making it Snyder's first original film ('Dawn' was a remake and '300' and 'Watchmen' were both based on graphic novels...) but that doesn't stop it from looking like it's based on something. 'Alice in Wonderland' meets 'Pan's Labyrinth' I suppose.

The story as far as the trailer reveals is that a young woman is thrown into a mental hospital and in an attempt to free herself from the pain of isolation, confinement, or possibly even torture, she creates a world inside her head where guns, sex, sounds and colors rule. Like the world of Baz Luhrmann's 'Moulin Rouge' blended with the cartoon universe from 'Cool World.'

Throw in heavy slices of Rodriguez's work from 'Sin City' and you have something resembling the craziness that's on screen here.

Inventing scenarios in the mind to escape reality is nothing new. I can spoil many a great film by revealing in which ones that occurs. But Snyder's visuals almost always break new barriers and dazzle the eye.

Unfortunately, that's all this trailer can say for itself. Much like the sense I got from the trailers for 'Speed Racer' there seems to be plenty going on to rot away the enamel of my brain, but not much for it to actually chew.

No real surprise there as Snyder's work has consistently failed at any exceptional depth. Anyone who argues otherwise really needs to watch '300' closer. Plenty of sizzle. No steak.

I want to see what Snyder shows me, but nothing presented here is going to impress upon me the need to pay 10 or 12 dollars for it. "Maybe on TNT."

"Sucker Punch" opens in March 2011.

Until next time.

Top 5 Guilty Pleasures

If you love movie trailers, then you have some that you enjoy for their art and execution.

But if you love movie trailers, then you likely have many that are just silly fun for you and bring excessive amounts of 'tee-hees' and giggles into the air around you.

So for your judging pleasure (because what's the internet for if not for judging?), I give you my top five favorite guilty pleasure movie trailers. Some of them are far better than the movies they advertise. Some of them are just plain silly. But each of these five brought a stupid smile to my face.

Number 5 - Fast and Furious


Like 'Rise of the Silver Surfer,' this teaser for the fourth entry in the 'Fast' franchise focuses mostly on a shortened version of one sequence from the film, always an effective trick.

What it also has going for it is the good fortune of revealing Vin Diesel's return to the role of Dominic Toretto, his character from the first film, who sat out the second, and popped in for a cameo at the conclusion of the third.

If you don't care for the 'Fast' films, this means nothing to you, and your eyes glaze over upon realization of what you're watching. But for me, these are stupid, fun brain-off flicks that feature some delightfully dumb characters and plots, pretty girls, and occasionally cool non-computer-assisted car stunts.

The tag line 'New Model, Original Parts' definitely drives up the 'tee-hee' factor, though nothing quite earns the giggle like Vin Diesel's menacing chuckle to the observation by one character that Paul Walker is a lucky man, because despite once dating Toretto's sister, he is "still breathing."

Tee-hee factor: FURIOUS

Number 4 - Superman Returns


Superman Returns. The trailer says exactly what the title says. This trailer is an announcement saying: Hey folks. Superman is back. No hints of plot. No hints of villain or conflict. Just Superman.

Taking its cues from the masterful Richard Donner 1979 original, 'Superman Returns' landed in 2006 after the once-powerful Superman franchise had sputtered to a pitiful end some 20 years earlier with 'Superman 4 - The Quest for Peace.'

This teaser continues along the Donner-established canon by beginning over darkness with a Marlon Brando voice-over (Brando played Superman's alien father in the original film). The music cue 'The Planet Krypton' from John Williams' timeless score for the original plays out over relatively classic Superman imagery, from people looking up into the sky to the Kent farm at sunrise, and of course -- perhaps the symbol of the Donner-era Kal-El -- Superman and Lois Lane on the roof of the Daily Planet.

Where the teaser adds a nice updated touch is the very last shot where Superman hovers silently in space, listening to the sounds from planet Earth below until one of them calls for his attention above the others -- after which his eyes snap open and he bursts into super-sonic flight toward Metropolis, causing a tremendous concussion when he hits the Earth's atmosphere. It's a beautiful moment in a beautiful trailer, and though the movie itself is weighty and curiously lacking in energy, this first teaser hits all the right spots.

Tee-hee factor: SUPER

Number 3 - Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire



Feeling like I spent my 'Harry Potter' trailer love on my first blog entry, I questioned including this, but then I remembered: this is about the tee-hee factor.

'Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire' teases us with a lovely bit of wandering down memory lane with fast glimpses of Harry, Hermione, and Ron over the course of four films, reminding audiences that these kids are growing up in front of our very eyes. This simple reminder creates an almost parental sort of concern for these characters, as for the briefest of moments we are forced to look upon them not as actors in a film, but living human beings. Young adults who were still children, not all that long ago.

A trick like this would not work with something like, say, Star Wars, where Harrison Ford looked roughly the same from film to film.

After the opening montage, the trailer is roughly as good as all the other Potter trailers, but the teaser opening has a warmth and specialness to it that puts it on my guilty pleasure list.

Tee-hee factor: MAGICAL

Number 2 - The Twilight Sage - Eclipse



I saw Twilight and was pretty bored. It wasn't the most offensive thing ever, but it was too gooey-gooey for me and I failed to understand the appeal (which is fine, it's not meant for me in the least, anyway). I saw New Moon and found it to be one of the most boring, horrible things ever committed to film. I can't tell you a single thing I remember. The whole movie made no sense and felt like the projector playing it was broken and playing everything really slow.

So I was delighted to see this trailer for the third entry in the series and to find that it consisted mostly of action, tossing around phrases like, "lives lost" and "killings." Imagery of Robert Pattinson and Taylor Laughtner don't increase my interest level, but other shots, such as an army of bad vampires walking out of a lake onto dry land or two vampire armies running toward each other ready to unleash hell is very much the kind of stuff I enjoy.

And then, of course, there are the werewolves, which despite being ridiculously muscular 18-year-olds while in human form, are still freaking wolves half the time and appear at the end of the trailer to do battle with the bad vampires and side with the good ones.

One thing that for me personally earns the Twilight films a few originality points is that in this universe, sunlight does not kill vampires, it merely reveals their true form (glittery-skinned Christmas-ornament-looking versions of themselves). As a result, this series remains the only vampire series where the monsters can battle during the day, giving it a visual edge over all others who are forced to keep to the rules and only allow their vampires to play at night.

So between the over-the-top operatic music, the visually different vampire battle, and the wolves looking like they're ready to bust some heads, this trailer got me to tee-hee enough to give the series one more chance after the awful, awful mess that was 'New Moon.'

Tee-hee factor: GLITTERY-SLIGHTLY-HOMO-EROTIC-STUPID

Number 1 - Terminator 2 Judgment Day



In the grand scheme of movie teasers and trailers, this one is neat but not necessarily one of the greats.

It earns its tee-hee points for presentation.

In 1990, James Cameron was hard at work on Terminator 2 and had no time to cut together a trailer for the film, despite the studio wanting some sort of announcement for the soon-to-be-released sequel to the sci-fi/action hit 'The Terminator.'

Recall that in 1990, the internet was no place for movie geeks to share news and excite one another, so trailers and posters were how the world found out what was coming.

So Cameron handed $100,000 to the late Stan Winston, the special effects wizard who for decades defined our cinematic standards when it came to monsters and effects. To this day, cinema remains changed because of him.

Winston went off and came up with the idea of robots on an assembly line. It's fun because they look familiar, but we're not sure why. We watch them get put together piece by piece, powered on with eyes glowing red, and finally put into a big chamber that appears to cover them in human tissue.

Pan up the newly-tissued robot and you find -- Arnold Schwarzenegger.

So simple. So fun.

Tee-hee factor: INFINITE

Until next time.

Greats of Yester-year: Star Trek

The Star Trek mythos has crossed the border into religious-experience territory, which is to say, it has becomes so big and so complex that it can mean completely different things to different people, and no one interpretation is incorrect anymore, no matter how different from Gene Roddenberry's original vision.

For myself, when at its finest, Star Trek has always been about hope, bravery and friendship.

These are the virtues most prominently on display in this trailer for JJ Abrams' reboot (but still a sequel and a prequel) Star Trek. But they're not the only thing this trailer is about.

Abrams gives us a new angle on the Star Trek mythos, something long-imagined but never-before-seen. Abrams gives us, as Joseph Campbell has termed it, the call to adventure. The moment when the heroes' life is forever changed.

What Campbell doesn't mention as much, but Abrams brilliantly infuses into his story is that this call to adventure is also a chance for the hero to reach out and grasp his potential, an incredibly strong core that every viewer can connect to, for haven't we all wondered what we're meant to do and who we're meant to be? Whether this was our path?

As one of the characters says to a young James Kirk at the open of the trailer, "Your father was captain of a starship for twelve minutes. He saved 800 lives, including yours. I dare you to do better." If that isn't a call to action and a clear line-of-sight to one's potential, I just don't know what is.

In addition to making for a powerful story, it also is a clever marketing device, for any life-long fan of Star Trek will tell you that while the characters and universe are carved in stone, the origin story has never been told. Suddenly we have the same old Trek with a brand new hook. I mean, it worked for Bond and Batman. Why not for Kirk and Spock?

A group called 'Two Steps From Hell' provides a track called 'Freedom Fighters' which serves as the powerful background music, once again driving home the notions of bravery, hope, friendship, and self-worth.

Pacing and energy are kept up by slick cutting and smooth transitions from action to character, with nice breaks for dialogue.

If the trailer has a fault, I would actually declare it a fault of director JJ Abrams, who despite being one of the smartest men in the business, is still developing his eye as a film director, and in doing so, has failed to produce a great money shot. Some have come close, such as the shot from Mission Impossible-3 (Abrams' feature debut) where a camera-bound Tom Cruise was knocked off his feet and into a car window by an explosion on a bridge behind him.



Abrams shoots action with great energy and is wise enough to stage and frame those sequences the same way he does his character moments, but despite the energy, there is some missing refinement. One only look at an action scene composed by James Cameron to appreciate this distinction -- some of his best examples being the Los Angeles River chase from Terminator 2 (which concludes with a great money shot of John and the Terminator on a motorcycle driving away from an exploding truck) or the bridge chase in True Lies (which ends with another great money shot of Arnold Schwarzenegger clinging to Jamie Lee Curtis from the bottom of a helicopter while her vehicle falls from the bridge into the ocean beneath her).

Regardless of this one minor gripe, the trailer works incredibly well on me, hitting everything that has ever moved me about Star Trek and promising me an adventure that I can't wait to go on.

Boldly, of course.

Until next time.

The Town

Cops and criminals and the people in between who always, always get hurt. This scenario has been executed countless times by countless filmmakers with sometimes incredible, mind-blowing results. I'm looking at you, 'Heat.'

The vast dramatic potential for this set-up also means that it will continue to be explored, time and time and time again.

Enter Ben Affleck, who outside of movies co-starring Matt Damon or written by Kevin Smith, has failed to ever truly impress me as an actor, but who shows surprising chops as a director. His first feature, 'Gone Baby Gone,' had a fierce amount of energy and richness to it, and Affleck's potential behind the camera rocketed past that of his actor-self.

I don't wish to insult, merely to observe here that Affleck's acting history tends to indicate that he just isn't interesting enough to play the roles offered to, say, Sean Connery when he crossed over to senior-citizen-status.

So along comes 'The Town,' a cops-and-criminals movie that borrows elements from movies as good as 'Heat' and as silly as 'Point Break' and 'The Fast and the Furious.' But as the trailer proves: treat any subject matter with enough dignity and it can become awesome.

For that's what this trailer was for me. Awesome.

I took a great amount of delight in the perversely updated look of the bank-robbers from 'Point Break' and the high-energy camera work. Watching Jon Hamm play someone that is not Don Draper is too cool, especially since he looks like a great, tough cop.

The performances look solid across the board as great actors are paired with an actor/director who knows how to nurture them and let them be. Jeremy Renner and Chris Cooper round out the supporting cast and I defy you to name one role from either of them that wasn't stellar.

The music through-out works powerfully with the images and subject matter, and the pacing is right on.

Points are lost due to the mid-trailer text that says: "From the Studio that brought you The Departed" That kind of cross-promotional branding is pathetic to me, and is becoming frustratingly popular these days. Allow me to re-write their copy:

"From the Studio that brought you The Dukes of Hazzard"

"From the Studio that brought you License to Wed"

or, my favorite:

"From the Studio that brought you Catwoman"

It's a dumb ploy. Anyone who takes the time to read the copy knows it's dumb. It's a completely unnecessary drawback to a fairly intense trailer that sells a movie that, though we have seen it before, shows serious promise.

'The Town' had enough that works on me (the genre, the performers, the directing) that I happily grant an "Opening Night" rating.

The picture opens in the US on September 10, 2010.

Until next time.

The Social Network

Leave it to the impressive talents of David Fincher and Aaron Sorkin to craft a film that gives the birth and times of Facebook a near-operatic quality. At least, that's sure how it looks.

Adapted from the book, "The Accidental Billionaires" by Ben Mezrich, "The Social Network" tells the story of Mark Zuckerberg and what led him to creating Facebook.com, the social networking site on which I will be advertising this blog entry.

Facebook itself has the interesting quality of sharing traits with a black hole: nothing can escape its gravitational pull. This in-and-of itself could be written off as merely amusing and topical, but when it becomes the poster child for the voluntary end of privacy, you have entered into territory shared by few.

You're talking about something very scary.

The makers of this trailer know this well.

Beginning with tiny glimpses into the lives of people we don't know, via profile interfaces with which we are all intimately familiar, the trailer quickly sets up Jesse Eisenberg (who shares some traits with Michael Cera without carrying Michael Cera's-Cera-baggage) as young Zuckerberg, a college kid who just wants into the exclusive clubs.

Boy, does he get there.

The trailer explains that the film will deal with unforeseen (and perhaps, immaterial to Zuckerberg) moral, ethical, and legal complications for his social networking site. Though it cleverly conceals most of the actual plot.

Typical snazzy Sorkin dialogue is present, along with Fincher's visual flourishes, and when combined with what looks to be a rich performance by Eisenberg and a slick turn by actor-singer-do-anything Justin Timberlake, sets up for a film that will amuse and unsettle.

One wonders how many people will delete their facebook accounts upon seeing the film, and how many 'uninitiated' will say to their friends, "See? This is why I never signed up."

As I mentioned before, the trailer has an operatic quality and sets up stakes that are almost global in impact, which is true enough. In the hands of lesser filmmakers (and certainly, lesser trailer-makers) this story could be small enough to only affect the lives of Zuckerberg and those around him. Given to Fincher and Sorkin -- well -- time will tell, but I have my suspicions.

The trailer itself is an incredible piece of work, and if the movie to follow is any indication, this is an easy 'Opening Night' rating.

'The Social Network' hits theaters on October 1.

Until next time.

Due Date

Because the only thing better than striking gold is doing the exact same thing and striking gold again, we're being given 'Due Date' from Todd Phillips, director of 'The Hangover.'

I say that he is repeating himself because in 'Due Date' we're being given another Zach Galifianakis performance that, from the trailer, is pretty much exactly the same character he played in 'Hangover.' Maybe Phillips is going the Kevin Smith route and building an inter-connected universe for his films where characters and events cross over from film to film.

A little evidence to support this theory is that in Phillips' first true hit, 'Old School,' a deleted scene has a creepy pervert character showing up at the heroes' house asking if he is in the right place for the "gang bang." In 'Hangover' this same character appears in an elevator giving a woman some oral pleasure before the four dudes get on board and ride to the roof. Also, this character is played by Phillips.

But I digress...

In 'Due Date,' Roberty Downey Jr. and Zach Galeoiueoeievkj play two mis-matched guys who are somehow stuck together on a cross-country trip to Los Angeles. Downey is the straight man while GalskdjldzjnmxcnnaiakdjhkJd plays the famous Phillips role of man-child, made even more apparent than ever before when Downey tells Galsadljhaosdid11-091-928093 to go to the bathroom before they leave a gas station and the reply is: "You're right. I need to pee-pee."

The trailer starts off strong with no wink to the fact that it is a comedy. The two heroes avoid a rain-storm and Downey is sharing a deeply personal tale about the last time he saw his father. The trailer lurches into gear when the response to this is inappropriate laughter, followed by the declaration, "My Dad would never do that. He loves me." It's a good start.

From there it falls into standard road movie/buddy comedy territory which shows various instances of them getting on each others' nerves and finding ways to get even with one another, the most humorous of which is when the two are hitching a ride with Jamie Foxx (whaaaa??) and Downey (in the passenger seat) commands Foxx (the driver) to hit a drainage ditch at high speed so that it will disrupt the peaceful truck-bed ride for Zach Galifianakis. The result is a good sight-gag.

While funny, ultimately the trailer does little to make itself look all that amazing. Its' premise isn't particularly interesting, but that's not really the point, is it? For movies like this, all we need is a set-up and knowledge of the actors in the film. The rest takes care of itself.

I suspect the reason for this is one of two things:

1) The movie just isn't very good and the trailer-makers are doing their best.

or

2) The movie is ridiculously hilarious and the fact that all green-band previews are required to be rated PG has limited the amount of vulgar hilarity that can be shown.

I suspect it's probably the second. After all, 'Old School,' 'The Hangover' and even Phillips' first hit 'Road Trip' are hard-R comedies that make good use of their ratings.

This trailer alone leaves me curiously hollow, and if not for my pre-existing knowledge of Phillips' body of work, and the fact that Robert Downey Jr. can (almost) do no wrong, I would be giving this a "Maybe on TNT."

Until next time!

Greats of Yester-year: Fantastic Four - Rise of the Silver Surfer

Fantastic Four - Rise of the Silver Surfer was released with thunderously low expectations. Despite a large box-office haul for the original, the treatment of the material (considering it was this same summer that Christopher Nolan gave us his reboot of Batman) had earned the movie an intensely negative reaction.

For a far superior film about a mostly-functional super hero family, viewers had to look no farther than Pixar's 'The Incredibles.'

So given the low-expectations for the 'Fantastic' sequel, it was incredibly refreshing to see a teaser that not only looked to improve vastly upon the original, but in its breathless two-minute run time gave viewers an amazing new character from the comics who promised to be a terrific foil for the super-family.

The teaser for 'Silver Surfer' does so many things right, it's amazing more films don't follow suit. First, it keeps dialogue to a minimum, staying almost entirely visual, and only allowing in one quick exchange.

Second, it wisely plays an abbreviated version of one whole sequence from the early part of the film, rather than a montage of images or a truncated version of the whole picture.

Finally, it gives the audience some of the best shots of the whole film in its precious two minutes, including the money shot of the Surfer revealing himself as he emerges from the solid wall of a building he has just thrown through, and a stunning shot of him letting one of our heroes fall back to earth from low orbit after having carried him there on his flying board.

But perhaps most impressively? It actually manages to make you gasp. A short story that you have less than two minutes invested in, and it actually makes you jump.

When a mysterious blue comet falls from the sky and starts guiding itself as only a living being on a silver surf board could, Johnny Storm, the mouth of the Fantastic Four, sheds his new tuxedo and bursts into flame, chasing the blue comet (as he can, of course, fly too).

Johnny, who the trailer establishes is very fast and powerful himself, chases the surfer through Manhattan and into the Lincoln Tunnel, where the silver being seems to melt right through whatever solid object heads his way.

Where the trailer grabs you by the throat is when Johnny almost manages to catch the surfer, but is surprised when the shiny being whips around like a hawk and stops him dead (grabbing him by the throat -- thank you) and dragging a helpless hero into the lower atmosphere before letting him drop into a free-fall that will surely kill him, although (SPOILER!) it doesn't.

This display of power and viciousness come as something of a surprise in the otherwise light 'Fantastic' series and serves to get the audience's attention. I can recall seeing this preview with a full crowd before a movie in late '06 and hearing people remark at the sight of the surfer dropping Johnny to earth from space.

It keeps with a smart few trailers that wisely know they need only show one good scene to hook their audience and get them to the theater, and it makes sure that you know -- this sequel means business.

Until next time!

Follow Up on 'Predators'

In my review for 'Predators,' I mentioned a shot that to me was the 'money shot' of the entire trailer and voiced my disappointment that it was featured in the middle of the trailer and not at the end, where it would have been more effective.

At a showing of 'Predators' this weekend, I noticed that (SPOILER ALERT) the shot above isn't even in the film! The moment comes and goes, but at no point do a dozen predators aim their targeting lasers at Adrian Brody.

So my disappointment was doubled -- until I read this today. In an interview with MTV News, Robert Rodriguez addressed this, saying that he came up with that on the day and filmed it JUST FOR THE TRAILER.

That's right. Rodriguez said he knew that was the money shot and knew that fans would be confused when it didn't show up in the movie, but he felt that would just add to the surprise, feeling that it was a great image for a trailer.

So. I'm just saying.

Wall Street - Money Never Sleeps

Yes, 'Money Never Sleeps' really is the title. Does this sound like a Bond-spoof to anyone else? Good lord.

So, here we are in 2010 with two different sequels to originals made in 1987. Predators was first (which to be fair, never really went away, what with sequels and comic books enough to fill Lucas Oil Stadium).

The second is the sequel to 'Wall Street,' a film which I have yet to see but it currently sitting at #16 on my Netflix queue. Despite never having seen all of it, I am familiar with Gordon Gekko, his famous, "Greed, for lack of a better word, is good..." speech, and the scene where Charlie Sheen is led past all of his co-workers in hand cuffs. I will be sure to catch it before the sequel hits.

Caught the trailer over the weekend at (ironically) a showing of Predators and it occurred to me this is a good trailer to review.

Featuring the return of Michael Douglas to his iconic role, the cast now includes Josh Brolin and Shia LeBeouf, who looks very interesting in the part of Charlie Sheen. In all seriousness, I enjoy LeBeouf. I enjoy his twitchiness and that he is the embodiment of the fact that geeks rule the world. Anyone who doubts me, watch Transformers and notice how despite being an action star in the sweatiest Michael Bay movie of them all, he is far too anxious and jumpy to be cool. Which just makes him cool.

The trailer only tells enough of the plot to learn that Gekko is released from prison, Shia is about to marry his daughter (who hates her father) and that Gekko is up to his old tricks, and pulls an Emperor/Anakin Skywalker relationship with the kid.

Whether Shia LeBeouf doesn't get the high-ground during his climactic fight with Obi-Wan, resulting in severed limbs and a giant black iron lung remains to be seen.

Either way, the trailer plays out well, even though it does run a bit long, and brilliantly features the Rolling Stones' 'Sympathy for the Devil' during the great majority of its run-time. Entirely appropriate if you a) know the character of Gordon Gekko or b) are Oliver Stone and are trying to say something about Wall Street in general.

Performances and technical specs look like they will be solid across the board, as tends to be the case with Oliver Stone.

Despite the previously-mentioned run-time of the trailer that could benefit from having about 10 seconds cut out of the middle, the return of Gordon Gekko looks promising, and we can only hope he gets what is (once again) coming to him. Before he turns Shia to the dark side, of course.

This earns an "In Theaters."

Until next time!

Appreciating Uniqueness

I talk a lot about uniqueness in movie advertising on this blog. As an audience member who has seen countless movie trailers over the years, I know every trick, every transition, every piece of music, every beat that Hollywood can throw at me.

And so do you.

Enter Britanick.com, who took that knowledge, wrote it down and gave us a spoof trailer called 'Movie Title.' Watch this and you'll see every moment that you're so familiar with broken down to its essential parts. You'll also laugh a lot.

Until next time.

Jack Goes Boating

Have you ever seen Phillip Seymour Hoffman not be great? Me neither. Now let's put him in front of and behind the camera in the same picture and see what that gets us!

The trailer for "Jack Goes Boating" works as effectively as every other trailer for every kind of movie like it. Which is a good thing, for they're all good trailers.

The sub-genre, which can now be pretty much called 'The Sundance Film' tends to be promoted exactly the same way from film to film, with exactly the same structure. While it still finishes with the 'action montage,' trailers for these kinds of movies feature smiling, laughing, crying and sure-to-be triumphant moments for the characters in the film.

I think this looks like it will be a good film. The same way I think every film promoted this way looks like it will be a good film.

This is to say that while the trailer does little different from its spiritual predecessors, I will still likely seek this film out upon its release.

The issue I take with trailers for films like these is that they rarely make much attempt to stand apart from each other. If I were to show you the trailers for the three other films referenced in this one (Little Miss Sunshine, Away We Go, and Sunshine Cleaning) you would see essentially the same trailer with different characters over and over again.

Not that other genres are immune to this. Not at all. If you've seen one action or comedy trailer, you've seen them all. I pick on these because these trailers all look amazing, where as clearly, not every action film looks particularly good (I cough in your general direction, Knight and Day).

As a blanket rule for me, trailers for these feel-good-and-learn-about-life Sundance films earn a "In Theaters" from me, but I continue to hope that I will find one that dares to be a little different, even if the movie is just like all the others.

Until next time.

Little Fockers

Incredible to think that a concept film has turned into a franchise, but this is Hollywood, and it probably is a highly bankable property.

'Little Fockers' will continue the antics of Ben Stiller's Greg (Gaylord) Focker and Robert DeNiro's ex-CIA father-in-law, Jack Byrnes, though to be honest, after seeing the trailer, they probably shouldn't. After all, by the third film, everyone has met everyone. No more awkward first impressions, which was always the centerpiece to the story.

Not that the trailer doesn't look like a funny movie. These are funny actors playing funny characters. And the unique chemistry between Stiller and DeNiro could probably keep 4 or 5 more 'Focker' films watchable. But interesting? That's another question.

We're told from the trailer that Greg and his wife Pam have two young children and that as the holidays approach, they will be getting visited by grandma and grandpa. Beyond that, the story involves Ben Stiller selling trial packs of an erectile disfunction pill, because let's be honest -- since the central thrust of the 'first-meeting' humor is gone, this third time will have to work harder and shoe-horn in some less-organic laughs.

This is proven to be the case by the fact that the last 40 seconds of a 1:40 trailer are dedicated entirely to explaining this plot thread and it's relevance. Funny, but unfortunate considering the simplicity of this great exchange from the original film when Stiller arrives in his green rental car and while meeting his potential in-laws for the first time, is met with this quip from DeNiro:

Byrnes - "Interesting color. You pick it?"
Focker - "No, the guy at the counter. Why?"
Byrnes - "Well they say geniuses pick green. But you didn't pick it."

As the cast members shown at the end prove, pretty much everyone (except a notably-absent Dustin Hoffman) will be back for this third outing, including some new faces to the franchise. And while the potential for laughs remain, the natural set-up has long since left, as now the Fockers have met the Byrnes, the Byrnes have met the Fockers, and now we're left with simply a disfunctional-family film, allegedly about how scared the little Fockers are of Grandpa DeNiro.

While no doubt setting up to be a flimsier entry in the franchise that should have been a stand-alone film, I do give this an 'In Theaters' rating, if for no other reason then experience has taught me that under whatever silly circumstances, DeNiro and Stiller together make me laugh.

Until next time.

Greats of Yester-year: Pearl Harbor

Let me start by getting it out of the way: I know the two reasons this movie is hated upon -- their names are Michael Bay and Ben Affleck. I get it. You get it. We all get it.

I'm not here to talk about that. I'm here to talk about this trailer and a personal connection to the material. I'm here to talk about imagery that settles into your minds' eye and doesn't ever let go. I'm here to talk about an amazing woman who, as well as I knew her, I barely knew.

What does all this have to do with the trailer to a bizarro Bruckheimer experiment into historical fiction starring the other half of Matt Damon's amazing career?

My grandmothers' name was Margaret. Marge. Grandma Marge, to me, my sister, and my two cousins. My memories of her consist largely of sitting in her living room with her and the family, watching television for hours and hours. Game shows in the early evenings. Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune. And then usually a violent movie after that. Well, violent by 80's standards. Cartoonish by todays.

Those foam, 3-D puzzles that were shaped like famous buildings collected dust around near every inch of her small three-bedroom home, yet I hardly ever saw her building one. The ancient brown carpet in the living room had a crease in it that I used to love to stand on. And there was always that smell that, though in hindsight may have been wood-rot or some kind of mold (the house was very old) always made me feel like I had stepped into a different world. The world that belonged exclusively to Grandma, and we were all just visitors. A select few outsiders that she chose to let in the door.

Her humor was vicious, but her smile when she made the joke was never, ever mean. Countless times I would do as I had been trained as a young boy, leaving her house with an over-the-shoulder "I love you, Grandma," to which she would always reply, "No, you don't." Never did she mean it, of course. Though to this day, I'm not sure if she was trying to teach me conviction or trying to build me a constitution that could respond to cynicism. Perhaps both.

Regardless, the visits were always a variation on the same cycle, which included food, minimal chit-chat, and that crease in the carpet.

But the TV. The TV was always on. I never saw it off.

Charles Bronson, Clint Eastwood and Arnold Schwarzenegger were staples of the television at Grandma Marge's. Maybe because they were tough. Maybe because they were so tough, they weren't quite real. Maybe because in some strange way, she had more in common with them then the Kathryn Hepburns of the world. Ironic considering that she so resembled a Hepburn in her youth. But her life was never so kind as to let her enjoy that.

In December, 1941, she was a beautiful young woman of 20, living in Hawai'i, existing in a curious life so different from what any of us can imagine. As a civilian working at the base at Pearl Harbor, she spent her days working around military men who flocked to her and begged her for dates, to which she got the sadistic pleasure of consistently letting them down, even though secretly, nothing made her stand up and take notice like a Marine. Arrogant, cocky things that they were. (It should be noted here that my Grandfather was a Marine).

On the morning of December 7, my grandmother awoke to the sounds of airplanes flying very close to the ground. A trip outside revealed a sky swarming with Japanese aircraft. Japanese Zeroes over an American naval base; planes so close to the ground that the expressions on the young pilots' faces could be seen.

My grandmother passed away 59 years later when I was a freshman in college. The childish boredom of my youth had turned into a growing interest in history, especially my family's history, but by the time I was of the age to appreciate what mattered, cancer had started its all-too-familiar damage, and communication was difficult, if not impossible. Combine that with being away during that first reckless year of college... you can fill in the rest.

I never really got to know the woman that I had watched so many hours of television with. Personally, anyway. She remains as present as ever in stories and anecdotes, usually involving her pulling tricks on my father and his siblings during weekly viewings of 'The Twilight Zone' that left them horrified and in need of new shorts.

But one of the few images she had shared with me as I passed from bored-youth to invested-young adult was of those Japanese pilots.

While I can't remember which happened first, this trailer for Pearl Harbor or Grandma passing away, I do know that the moment I saw it, all I could think about was her. The shot of the children on the baseball field, as the Japanese aircraft pass by, hovering what looks like ten feet off the ground. It was a picture drawn from my mind, based solely on her brief description of what she had seen that day.

Words are too indelicate to describe what it felt like to get this brief window into the woman that I had known and not really known for my entire life.

In the most unusual way, a piece of gimmicky advertising from a lowest-common-denominator producer had given me something that I could never have imagined. Perspective. Every conversation I'd ever had with my grandmother came into new light. Her every pause when telling a story. Every far-off look in her eye.

Perhaps that's why she liked those Bronson/Eastwood/Schwarzenegger movies so much. Maybe she'd just seen enough reality for a lifetime, and now merely required cartoons for tried-and-tested adults.

This trailer has long stood as an important piece of work for me. The music and imagery in it capture an epic sense of tragedy and loss, a vicious rape of freedom and pride, arguably not felt again until the second September of the last decade.

But mostly, whenever I see it, I am reminded of a fact I still believe today: that big things, little things, anything can be a window for you to gain a fresh perspective. And I remember how lucky I am that a little bit of that general childhood disinterest was forgiven for me, and I got to know an amazing woman just a tiny bit better.

Michael Bay can make as many Transformer 2's as he wants, and you can all hate him with as much hate as you can. I'll forever owe him at least a little bit.

Until next time.

The Green Hornet

I really need to stop for a moment and let my brain grapple with the idea that Bruce Lee and Seth Rogen are a part of the same franchise.

It might be too much.

'The Green Hornet' comes to us next year from Michel Gondry, who despite having an incredible eye and imagination, has yet to produce consistent cinematic fare. His first feature 'Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind' landed rightfully on every critics' list of important films from the first decade of the twentieth century. His other wide release, 'Be Kind Rewind' did not appear on any.

Fail as Gondry might at being a box-office champion, he has consistently managed to blow people's mind with his own, so one can only expect as much from 'Hornet.'

Added to that mix is a curiously trim and Apatow-less Seth Rogen, who between 'Observe and Report,' 'Funny People' and now 'Hornet' is bravely reaching as far away from his 'Knocked Up/40-Year-Old-Virgin' lovable-loser-stoner persona as he possibly can. And to him I say keep going, Seth. You can do it.

I actually don't know much at all about 'The Green Hornet' that isn't presented in the trailer: Britt Reid is a rich kid who inherits his dead father's money, toys, and side-kick Kato (played in the original TV show by a very-young but still cool-as-ever Bruce Lee). So discussing how it looks as an adaptation of the TV show, I can't be of help.

But where the key elements are in place for an interesting entry into the super-hero/TV adaptation genre, the trailer plays out with relatively little interest in highlighting any of this, tending instead to go for a more safe 'Rush Hour'-style approach, right down to the mismatched-leads-that-are-hilariously-mismatched humor mixed in with some action, where one party seems to be doing most of the work.

Blink-and-you-miss-him is recent Oscar winner Christoph Waltz, who terrified every single human being that saw him as S.S. Colonel Hans Landa in Tarantino's 'Inglorious Basterds.' Why they don't play up his presence more, I'm really not sure. The prospect of seeing him play another villain seems just too sweet, but he barely sneaks his way into 3 or 4 fleeting shots, and only one line of angry-Euro-villain dialogue manages to be uttered.

The movie looks promising enough, but this is entirely based on the knowledge that Gondry is at the helm and Seth Rogen has yet to fail me in the belly-laugh department, as he does in this trailer. The preview itself does little to set the movie apart from other action-comedies and honestly plays with about the same integrity as a 'Charlie's Angels.' Entertaining but oddly brainless.

And perhaps that's exactly what this movie is.

If not for a 'Freaks and Geeks' hangover soft spot for Seth Rogen and sheer interest in a Gondry-helmed action/superhero flick, this would get no better than a 'Maybe on TNT' from me.

Until next time!

*CORRECTION - It has been pointed out to me that 'Eternal Sunshine' was Gondry's second feature, not his first. Apologies and thank you for the correction.

Eat, Pray, Love

At the request of a co-worker (and in an attempt to make clear that I won't only be reviewing genre-trailers on this blog) I will take a look at the trailer for Eat, Pray, Love, a new coming-of-middle-age movie starring an increasingly-rare Julia Roberts.

Motherhood has kept Julia Roberts from headlining many movies in recent years, which the trailer knows. By keeping her a secret for as long as it can (about thirty seconds) they reveal her with one of those romantic-comedy pops where the screen goes quiet and then quickly goes to white with a gentle cymbal crash, indicating mostly, "Hey look! It's Julia Roberts!"

The photography did stand out to me in this trailer, as I found some unusual lighting and camera movement choices that pulled the material out of the more normal fare its peers offer.

While not altogether a bad trailer, one thing this does that I personally can't stand is presenting running sentences broken apart by segments of film. That is to say, when a trailer says, "All she wanted..." then cuts to footage from the movie, then comes back to say, "was another chance..." then does it again, then comes back a third time to say, "at true love."

This annoys me as my attention span is usually so short that I fail to string the entire sentence together, only picking up pieces of what the words on the screen are telling me. And unless those pieces pack serious punch by themselves, then I don't even care what they're saying.

'Eat, Pray, Love's trailer brings nothing particularly new to the table, which is to be expected as movies of this type go. That fact remains heartbreaking because the story of exploring oneself is so full of possibility and the movies so capable of uniqueness that for it to fall into the category of 'typical' is to do a disservice to the concept (and as is often the case, to the film).

While the movie will no doubt delight its audience (Julia Roberts is always appealing) the trailer fails to insist to me that I put much effort into seeing this film. While admittedly not their target demographic, this trailer earns a "Maybe on TNT."

Until next time!

Greats of Yester-year: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)

In this section, I'll occasionally stop to revisit some of the greats of yester-year. Maybe along the way, I'll spark a moment of nostalgia in some of you all. Cause who doesn't like a little nostalgia from time to time?

For this first entry, I'll take a look at one of the great horror trailers of recent cinema, Marcus Nispel and Michael Bay's remake of 'The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.'

I remember seeing this trailer in the theater, having never seen the original 'Chainsaw' and not being particularly interested in the prospect of a remake, but being thrown into stunned, amazed silence as the trailer's final act unfolded. For that is where the strength lies in this particular promo --

That final movement.

The first minute and nineteen seconds of the trailer play out fairly standard, if spectacularly shot for a horror film. Horror after all is THE low-budget genre, and the look for so long was defined by Wes Craven and John Carpenter, two brilliant engineers of suspense who despite their talents, remain mostly unremarkable photographers.

But at a minute-twenty, the trailer rockets into something more interesting -- brief moments of action punctuated by creepily-flashing lights and a strange sound effect, which in the film itself is used as the sound of crime scene photographers snapping photos.

Following this, the screen goes black and we are treated to only the sound of a woman running and sobbing hysterically, followed a moment later by the sound of heavy boots making their way across a wooden floor in calm pursuit.

Over this we are erroneously told that the film is inspired by a true story. I suppose folks aware of Ed Gein know this to be true in the faintest sense of the word. For a more appropriate profile, Buffalo Bill or Norman Bates are better examples than Leatherface. But I digress...

This chilling silence is broken by the roar of a chainsaw -- the first in the trailer -- and the usual fast horror/action montage complete with unnerving music that screams: DANGER! But within this montage are equally creepy shots that, especially out-of-context, add relentless amounts of sickly twistedness to the proceedings. We catch glimpses of a heavily-eye-browed R. Lee Ermey getting sadistic pleasure as Jessica Biel cries "they're killing him!" Brief shots of what appear to be inbred family of the main villains pop up as well, and the whole thing finishes with its only (brief) look at the new Leatherface as he slams a large metal door shut.

It's a fantastic attention-getter and as trailers go, is something of lightning in a bottle. It's structure is different from its contemporaries (though it has certainly inspired its fair share of copy-cats) and the movie's opening weekend box-office surely owes its success to this piece of advertising.

Until next time.

Predators

Here comes 'Predators,' a reboot/update/sequel to the original 1987 action/horror staple, 'Predator,' a franchise which, despite originally being comprised mostly of ridiculous machismo and a fantastically bizarre villain, has slowly deflated over the years as other filmmakers chip away at the legacy, either taking the material too seriously or not seriously enough.

Enter Robert Rodriguez, whose reputation needs no regurgitation in this review. The story goes that Twentieth Century Fox, in a desperate bid to compete with the likes of Batman Begins and Casino Royale, turned to an old treatment written by Rodriguez 16 years ago as a sequel to the original Predator, and asked him if he would revisit the material and breathe new life into the franchise.

While I will be seeing the film this weekend upon its release, and while I'm sure Rodriguez will restore the franchise to at least some of its pre-Alien-crossover glory, I can't say this trailer does much to inflate my confidence.

Most of the blame for this falls on the choice of environment (a fault of the film, not the trailer). The original Predator took place in the jungles of Guatemala, and shot on location in real jungles (of Mexico, not Guatemala). This lent the original film a vastness that is impossible to create on a soundstage, no matter how sharp the eye shooting the film (I refer readers to Sleepy Hollow on this point).

So while the concept presented in the trailer is very exciting, the visual realization of it isn't different enough for us to get much bent-out-of-shape about it.

The concept for those who have not seen the trailer is that a group of humans are brought to the Predators' world as prey in a giant game preserve. (Why the Predators are required to still wear their breathing apparatus on their own world is beyond me, but I'm hopeful this will be addressed in the film...)

So here we are, a group of abducted humans brought to the Predators' world, and with all the vast resources and computer generated imagery that make Star Wars city-scapes and Avatar's Pandora possible -- the promising predator game-preserve looks just like -- the jungles of Guatemala. How exciting.

Predator 2 took the visual of the first film in an interesting new direction by putting the hunt in the middle of Los Angeles, a different jungle by any account. So why have these talented fellows at Troublemaker chosen a world that looks just like ours? Couldn't they have at least digitally painted the leaves on the trees red or something?

That's my first gripe with the trailer -- the fact that I feel like I've seen it before.

My second major criticism of the trailer is that the most suspenseful, interesting shot in the trailer is wasted in the middle of its run-time, with relatively little fanfare. Adrian Brody (our hero) stands in medium close-up, looking terrified, as several of the predators' signature targeting lasers appear across his face and torso.

I understand the choice to use this shot here -- until this point the trailer has been vague with what it is, and by showing the signature triangle-dot laser design, it's meant to be the 'A-ha!' moment for those not sure what they're seeing. Unfortunately, it's the visual high-point for the trailer, and from here, it never quite recovers.

The result is that the remaining 45 seconds of the preview are a cluttered montage of images that play out largely in the dark, and while appearing intense, show nothing particularly memorable.

The audio choices are interesting, relying mostly on alien-sounding noises for effect and working to sprinkle in that dash of horror that has been sorely missing from the Predator franchise for the last two decades.

While not a terrible trailer -- as I said, the Predator fan in me requires that I see the film this weekend -- it doesn't do very much to bring fresh interest or visuals to a movie monster that so richly deserves both. The trailer will only engage Rodriguez fans or Predator fans, no one else.

Tonight I will introduce my rating system for trailers:

"Opening Night!" for the best of the best. "In theaters" for the good ones. "Maybe on TNT" for the unimpressive ones. And "They're Not Even Trying" for the worst of the batch.

Based on this trailer, 'Predators' earns an "In Theaters."

Until next time!

Inception

Inception is a very slick piece of movie advertising, unabashedly cashing in on our fond memories of 'The Dark Knight' while at the same time giving us imagery unlike anything we've ever seen, and presenting a trailer that gives no real hints as to the movies' actual plot.

Brilliant.

Like 'Deathly Hallows' (and really, heck, all trailers nowadays) music selection is key and a piece of music called 'Mind Heist' by Zack Hemsey explodes off the screen, using an unusual sound effect to punch up text as it flies in.

Unlike 'Hallows' however, Christopher Nolan's movie seems to have no shortage of money shots. From the first glance at people seemingly frozen, floating in a hotel room, to the shot that will be in every promo (THE money shot) of the city folding backward over the heads of Leo DiCaprio and Ellen Page, moment after moment is carefully composed and crafted, each image sticking with you and striking you as something you have flat-out never seen.

Images such as a train barreling down a rainy, traffic-filled street work brilliantly, if for no other reason then you have to ask yourself -- "Well, how did it get there? What stops it?"

As for dialogue and exchanges in the trailer, that's pretty flawless as well. The dialogue sets up what DiCaprio's character does for a living, explaining how we are seeing such wonders, but tells nothing of the story itself, nor how or why he does what he does. But it's built so effectively that even an off-screen line like "The dream is collapsing!" seem ominous and promising.

True to the structure of the modern movie trailer, it ends with a fast bit of humor, but even the humor is macabre, and leaves the audience wondering exactly how much else does Nolan have to show us?

And does anyone else wish that the Matrix sequels would have had this kind of stuff going on, rather than power-loaders shooting robotic squid?

Until next time!

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

To get this blog going with its actual mission, let's take a look at Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.

The saga of Harry Potter draws to its end with a larger-than-life story that brings his battle with the forces of evil in the wizarding world to an end. In the way an epic of this magnitude requires, people die, things we know are changed forever, and the stakes are no less than the wizarding world, but our own as well.

The film will no doubt capture some of this, but the trailer falls short of expectations for me, relying mostly on its music for its epic quality. David Yates, the director of Harry Potter films 5, 6, and the final two films from one book, has never been particularly good at crafting a 'money shot' in his films. No easy task given the incredible sights and their general abundance in a Harry Potter film.

Where this becomes a problem is that the trailers for his film, while action-packed, lack a visual quality that was rich in the first four films of the series. This is not to call Yates weak, as he has directed two very interesting chapters so far, but rather to say that his training from television and not cinema has had the visual effect of not looking for the money shot. The trailer shot. The shot of the bomb squad guy pulling up six bombs out of the dust in the Hurt Locker.

Structurally the trailer is messy, with a slow dialogue beat to start, followed by intense montage, then stopped with a further awkwardly not-as-tough-as-you-want exchange, followed by more action.

Again, the music soars and helps elevate the material, but the visuals don't quite rise to meet the audio, and one is left longing for something a bit more.

For the best trailer the Potter saga has to offer, brimming with mystery, magic, fun, and built with purpose and class, they will never top the original teaser for "Prisoner of Azkaban."



Until next time!

Top 5 Movie Trailers

We'll start this off with a list... my personal favorite movie trailers. Now I must confess that I have not seen EVERY movie promo ever made. That would just be crazy. But here is my list of five that got my eyes open so wide and my smile so big, my face hurt me more than it usually hurts other people.

So, without further blah blah...

5) Spider-Man (the banned World Trade Center trailer) VIEW HERE

This bad boy surprised me in the summer of 2001 when I was sitting alone in an air-conditioned theater about to see Jurassic Park 3. It got me on many levels: 1) I knew a Spider-Man movie was being made but I didn't know they had a teaser prepared. 2) I didn't know it was Spider-Man until the last twenty seconds. And 3) building a web between the twin towers of the World Trade Center was just so... weird... and catching a helicopter in it like a bug was inspired.

The trailer was pulled from theaters after 9/11, but I consider myself fortunate enough in having seen it, complete surprise that it was, on the big screen in its original pre-9/11 glory.

4) Godzilla VIEW HERE

While the movie disappointed and their promotional campaign eventually started to crush down on the picture before its release... this teaser did what the name promised... it TEASED. Like Spider-Man, this appeared to be something else entirely at first... a tonal pre-cursor to Night at the Museum... but came out with a GOTCHA moment that certainly caught me by surprise. The tagline 'Guess Who's Coming to Town' worked like a charm. The phrase, "From the Creators of Independence Day" still had meaning, and finally, by not showing the beast in promos, they made that fan-interest turn into burning desire to know! Again, not showing the beast at all in any promo got annoying and wore out eventually, but for this first little taste... superb monsieur.

3) Star Wars - Episode I - The Phantom Menace VIEW HERE

I'm comfortable saying two things: 1) the Phantom Menace was not the weakest of the Star Wars prequels and 2) this trailer took every geek in the world and simultaneously turned all of our brains into mush for 2 whole minutes.

It's hard to see now, with games and animated series, and sitcoms, and Seth MacFarlane... but there was a time when Star Wars was 16 years away from our consciousness. Well... most of us. Some of us had toys and posters and comics and secretly were slowly dying inside waiting for the promise of more adventures with lightsabers to make their way across the big screen. Well, at this blog I review trailers, not movies, so the quality of the Star Wars prequels will be left to better folks. But this trailer, the moment that theme pounded, the moment that lightsaber whirred, when Obi-Wan meets Anakin for the first time... the creatures! The space battles! The explosions! A bad guy with horns and a red face? And holy goodness!! A two-bladed lightsaber!! If you can do it without getting angry, let your mind go back in time twelve years to the fall of '98 when you first saw Star Wars promising to make you young again.

2) Independence Day VIEW HERE

Three simple sentence... one simple image... perfection in advertising. ID4 (has anyone figured out what the heck that really means?) made only three promises in its early advertising campaign -- that on July 2, they would arrive. On July 3, they would attack. And on July 4, we would fight back. And whoever 'they' were, you know they meant business cause they cruised around in ships that cast shadows over entire cities and they blew up the White House. And that's the other thing... blowing up the White House...

In 1994, when this trailer hit, Bill Clinton was two years into his presidency, and while not the worst thing to ever happen to American politics, he was a goof, he spoke with a southern drawl (which we all forgot about during the W years) and he was an obvious womanizer in the White House. So while not offensive enough to elicit victory cries from people, the sight of the White House getting blowed up good by aliens with a sense of humor was just cute enough that people could laugh and cheer. Then politics had to get all serious again...

1) Alien VIEW HERE

I did not have the pleasure of seeing this in a dark auditorium with a full crowd. But watch this... just watch... and tell me you're not terrified. And the best part is that from this teaser, you ain't seen nothin, yet.

Well, thanks for reading. How about you all? Got any trailers that made an impression?

In a World...

Welcome to David's Preview Reviews!

Cutting to the chase... I'm a movie-guy. As such, when I go out to a movie, one thing I cannot stand is missing the previews. If I miss even one green band, it leaves a sour taste in my mouth that hangs with me for the next two hours.

My long-standing love for movie trailers began early in life and fortunately for me, as I have gotten older and (I hope) more mature, so have movie trailers. They are an art-form in and of themselves anymore, daring to tell a story that captivates and sparks your imagination, while hopefully not giving away too much of the larger story they promise to tell.

So here is where I review the previews. Cause I like 'em that much. Don't judge me. Yeah, you.

Thanks for reading!